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SELECTED CATEGORY» Military  ::   Number of Jokes» 2
Just the Facts
The first mate on a ship got drunk for the first time in his life.  The ship's captain, a stern and rigid man, recorded in his log, "The first mate got drunk today."

The mate protested against the entry, explaining that if it remained in the log without further comment or explanation it could ruin his career because it suggested that drunkenness was not unusual for him, whereas he had never been drunk before.  The captain, however, was adamant, stating that the log recorded the exact truth and therefore must stand as written.

The next day, however, it was the first mate's turn to write the ship's log. When the first mate was finished with his log entry it stated, "The Captain was sober today."
I'm Just Following Orders, Sir.
A recent recruit was on guard at the main gate of a key naval base, and was given strict orders to admit absolutely no cars that had not been issued a special new permit. Finally, the inevitable happened. The recruit stopped a car in which a high-ranking officer was the passenger.
"Drive on," ordered the admiral to his driver, dismissing the guard with a wave.
"I'm sorry, sir, but I'm new at this," admitted the recruit, drawing a deep breath. "Who do I shoot, you or your driver?"
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